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no1nerd

Me with all the walls down

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God and me

LETTER TO A 34YR OLD ME

dear-future-me-2-1920x1079

Today, I’m thinking about life, my life. Past, Present, Future. I’m thinking a lot about my future. Yesterday, a friend of mine told me about a seminar she attended where the speaker said to write a letter to yourself 15 years into the future. That thought fixated on my mind. What will I be like in 15 years? Will I have left behind my sometimes childish and naïve optimism? Will I have finally donned that cape of cynicism that this world is constantly trying to throw over me? Will I have grown into myself, into my dreams? Will I have made some of my dreams reality and still be chasing more? Or will I have left those ‘impossible’ dreams behind for good and faced monotonous reality? Who will I be? Where will I be?

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BREAK FREE

Freedom

It’s time.

You robbed my peace.

You stole my sanity.

You burgled my identity.

You shuffled my life.

You’ve done enough, I think.

It’s time.

I cast you out this minute.

Out of my life, I rebuke you.

Out of my mind, I banish you.

Out of my heart, I expel you.

It’s time

Leave me be.

Let my heart be free.

Let this torment be done.

Let these wounds finally heal.

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My Psalm

psalm

So in the Catholic Church, we celebrate mass. It’s done in place of what other denominations call service. It’s so much more than a service though. It is a feast, a communion, a celebration of the last supper, consecration of bread and wine…and so much more. But I’m not here to talk about the Catholic faith.

Anyways, the sequence of mass goes; the introductory rites, then one or two readings then a psalm before the gospel reading then the homily, Eucharistic celebration and conclusion. The responsorial psalm is a short song which can be a whole psalm or part of psalms. Usually someone recites or sings it while the congregation replies a refrain.

So this week, I was ‘chosen’ –but really, actually forced– to be the one to sing the psalm for Wednesday mass, a big deal for the Catholics in my school.

After a week’s practice, I was ready to take on the stage. Here is what I sang.

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PEACE

peace-of-God

Do you ever feel sometimes everything is going wrong for you. Ever feel that everything that was previously arranged in your life was falling apart. Or is it just me. A few months ago, my life was thrown into upheaval. My friendships were falling apart, my accommodation status was shaky. Family was….well, you get the point.

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